Russell Brand hopes to hook up with Dita Von Teese

Russell Brand has claimed he’s on the verge of hooking up with Dita Von Teese.

He told the Sun recently: “I saw Dita Von Teese at the Chateau Marmont Hotel [recently].”

“At the risk of looking incontinent, I walked past her several times to the toilet to get her attention. Eventually she saw me and we started chatting. I was saying some brilliantly funny things, slowly tempting her into my web.”

“I was thinking to myself, ‘You like Marilyn Manson? You like weirdos? I’ll give you weirdos. Androgynous freaks is it?’ It was going well and she goes, ‘Would you like my number? Call me any time you are bored’.”

“I said, ‘I wouldn’t have to be bored to ring you, darling’.”

“Later I texted her, ‘Oddly, now I feel perpetually bored. Everything seems pale having met you’. She replied, ‘You have a way with words’. So it’s all going well.”